Whether it’s in the middle of an office debate or over a family meal, we’ve all heard it: ‘Oh! You’re too sensitive.’ And when those words hit us like a familiar blow, don’t we start to wonder whether our emotions are justified or if we’re, once again, overreacting?
Have you ever felt the need to apologise for a perfectly reasonable emotional reaction? One of the telltale signs of gaslighting is that moment of uncertainty, when you start to question if you’re exaggerating the situation.
When someone dismisses your feelings, they’re doing more than just brushing you off; they’re systematically chipping away at your confidence in your own perceptions. The ‘don’t be sensitive’ remark carries the weight of a continual reminder that women’s emotions are a liability rather than an essential component of being just a human.
The Psychology of Self-Doubt
Try to remember the last time someone asked you to “calm down” while you were angry or upset. Did you ever question your feelings, even if they seemed reasonable?
One way gaslighting can be used is by gradually making a woman’s reality seem invalid. When a woman’s loved ones, even other women, tell her she’s ‘too sensitive’ about her emotions, they’re essentially saying that her feelings are wrong.
Later on, she starts to internalise this message. In an effort to avoid being classified as “over-dramatic,” she could start to bury her emotions, stay out of fights, and mute herself. This goes beyond simple emotional wounds; it’s a kind of maladaptive programming that may cause anxiety, sadness and a total disconnection from one’s internal experience of emotion.
The worst part? Once a woman starts to doubt her own emotions and judgement, she becomes an easy target for exploitation.
Reclaiming Your Emotional Truth
Sometimes, the one who says you’re “too sensitive” is the one who gains an advantage when you bottle up your feelings.
Recognising the validity of your emotions is a basic but crucial step in recovering from gaslighting. It means unlearning years of emotional suppression, so don’t get discouraged if the journey feels tough.
Building a support system of trustworthy loved ones who understand and validate your emotions is important. Rebuilding a healthy connection with your emotions starts with allowing yourself the room to recognise them without self-judgment.
Stop apologising when you feel strong emotions. Your emotions are attempting to tell you something; listen to them and let them lead you to what you need.
Remember: Your sensitivity isn’t a kind of flaw to fix; it’s a superpower to embrace.
